Entry #6 Unfiltered & Still Healing

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Acne might look like just a skin problem but it can feel like something much deeper. I've struggled with acne for years, visiting dermatologist, trying countless products, and even considering Accutane at one point. It's one of the most frustrating things I've ever faced because it doesn't just change how you look it changes how you feel about yourself. I admire people with clear skin and hoping for mine to get to that level. Having skin issues can be physically painful, mentally exhausting and emotionally draining.

                        

 

 

There were days when I didn't even want to look in the mirror having acne made me question my worth and compare myself to people with perfect skin. No one talks enough about how painful it is when you're doing everything right and still breaking out. The insecurity can eat you up inside and make you lose confidence in yourself.                                

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What I've learned from visiting dermatologist is that acne doesn't have one simple cause. For some people, it's hormonal. For others, it's related to diet, stress or even genetics. According to the Mayo Clinc  acne occurs when hair follicles become clogged with oil and dead skin cells, and hormonal changes can make it worse.

There are days I avoided mirror completely. I remember ghosting myself from people on social media because I was tired of pretending I was okay with it. I've cried so many nights over my skin not out of vanity but out of exhaustion. When you've tried everything and nothing seems to work it breaks something inside you. I've learned that sometimes the biggest part of healing acne is learning to be patient. There are no miracle products! it is about consistency, gentleness, and self love.                                                                                            

Acne might take time to heal, but it doesn't define who you are. It's hard to love yourself when your reflection doesn't match how you want to look, but I've learnt that healing comes inside and out, I may not have perfect skin yet but I'm learning to see progress as beauty too.

I miss that baby skin, the kind I never worried about.

My face has healed, but not completely.

 I still hide behind filters on the days I can't face my reflection.

 I've cried, I've prayed, I've waited.

 It's better now, but not where I want it to be.

Still, I thank God for progress even when I'm waiting for peace.